Things I'm Thankful For

Someone on my quilt board yesterday said November is "Thankful Month" and posted the question, what are you thankful for.  So this got me thinkin'...  There's always the easy stuff, family, friends, husband, roof over my head, you know the drill, but what about the "deeper" stuff...  So here goes my list of things I'm thankful for and why:

Home.  Beyond the usual roof over my head, I am thankful for my home- most everyone has a house, but a home is so much more.  It is certainly not the house of my dreams but it is the home where my dreams live.  A place of love, comfort, joy...  Everything that makes life worth living resides within those walls. 

Work.  First, it's good to have a job, especially when the job market's not so good.  But more importantly, I LIKE my job (most days) and I work for and with good people.  Yes, we all have our days where the sandbox isn't big enough for all of us, but for the most part, it's a good environment. People get along. There's not a lot of temper tantrums, back stabbing or gossip mongering. And the day is seldom dull.  So all in all, there's a lot to be thankful there, too.

Freedom.  It really is great to be able to love or hate things at will and not be afraid to say so.  It's amazing that people put their lives on the line every single day so that I can continue to have that right and for them I will always be thankful.  

Infertility.  Ask me 8 years ago if I'd have thought this and I'd have told you you're friggin' nuts (though probably not so politely), but as I reflect on those years, I know that infertility has introduced so many wonderful things into my life, I guess in the end it's not the worst thing to ever happen to me.  It's why I've met some of my very best friends.  It's why I've been able to pursue one of my true passions, quilting, to my heart's content.  It's shown me there's nothing in the world my husband and I can't overcome because we can lean on each other and get through it.  Most of all, it's taught me to live and appreciate everything I have instead of dwell on things I don't.  

So that's my list for today.  Will have to keep thinking about and see if anything else comes to mind.  

One of life's coolest experiences

I had one of the best lunch hours of my life today.  A friend & co-worker invited me along for her ultrasound today!  She's almost 35 weeks pregnant so baby's fully developed and just workin' on readying those little lungs and growing now so it was really cool!  No doubt at all that she's a she- you could definitely tell what those parts were!  And because she's getting herself ready for life on the outside, the tech pointed out the chest movements while she "practices" breathing.  How freakin' cool is that? Getting to see the chambers in her heart work while listening to it beat- I know I'm probably not typing anything most of you haven't already seen with your own pregnancies but for me, this was truly an awesome experience I've never had before and I feel quite honored for the opportunity to see life in it's absolute most innocent state.  Can't wait to meet her on the outside now! 

It's been an exciting week

So first I find out I get to be a "grandma" then I discover grandkitties! How much fun is that?

We have a pair of stray cats that have been living in the neighbor's back yard for several months. We've sort of adopted them this summer and have been feeding them (I know, bad us) but have been surprised that the little female hasn't had a litter of kittens- Rich even suggested she may have been someones indoor cat, fixed and at some point let out to fend for herself since we know the male cats been, shall we say friendly, but we never saw any signs of pregnancy in her.

This morning as I was getting ready for work I was quite surprised to see mom come around the corner with 3 little kittens! One is the exact shade of gray as Dad, one jet black and a third I don't remember the coloring on. My guess is they're at least a month old which makes me sad because it means we're unlikely to ever be able to get a hold of them to socialize them and find 'em good homes- months of visiting with mom and dad (Spot and Shadow to us) has gotten us no closer to them than a minimum distance of a yard so I don't expect we'll have any better luck with the kittens but they sure are cute!

Of course this being fall and us living in town, we are going to have to do the inevitable and figure out a way to catch the family and either take them to the humane society or relocate them to a friend's farm, but for today at least, I'm so entertained to discover the cute little things I can't help but smile!

This crazy little thing called life

Once in a while life has a funny way of giving you what you want.  For several years now I've joked about how I'm looking to adopt a nice 25 year old who's married and ready to have kids.  Since the fertility gods don't seem to like me I think it's the perfect solution- already grown so none of those ugly teenage years, through school so no big education bills to afford and already married so I don't have to fork out for the wedding but ready to give me a few grandkids. How friggin' perfect does that sound?  

Well, turns out the joke's not so far from reality...  Found out last night that one of our nieces is expecting.  She's right in the wheel house age wise and since her dad passed away last year, we've kinda become the surrogate parents- the one's who helped sort through her dad's house and wrap up his estate, who she introduces the new boyfriend to and that sort of thing. Not so married, but, well, in this day and age that hardly seems a requirement anymore.  So apparently, at the ripe old age of 35, I'm gonna be a "grandma".  That's a big ol' HA to my mom who had to wait until she was darn near 60! (oh wait, don't tell her I said that...) 

Now the funny part is there is a tiny little part of me that once again feels like I've gotten the shaft... Do things in the "correct order"- college, job, marriage, try to have a kid and look what I don't have to show for it but I really am 99% excited! This is gonna be so much fun!!!

The Grand Experiment Day 1

Well, it just wasn't practical to start last week so we held out until last night to officially kick off the Gluten Free Experiment. So far it's gone a little something like this-

Sunday Dinner- Homemade pizza. Raging success. It was my 3rd attempt at a GF crust. The first one had good flavor but the texture of soggy cardboard. So I tweaked a little to arrive at crust #2, again, good flavor, slightly improved texture but still a bit too chewy for my tastes. Last night tweaked a little harder and DING DING DING we had a winner. Good, consistent texture, good flavor. I may add a dash of salt next time but otherwise, it's good enough to run with. Recipe goes a lil' something like this:

1 c warm water
1 pkt (2 1/4 t) yeast
1 t sugar
1 1/2 t olive oil
1/2 c white rice flour
1/4 c sorghum flour
1/4 c potato starch
1 1/2 t xanthum gum
2-3 cloves crushed garlic

Dissolve the sugar and yeast in 1/2 c of water and let sit about 10 minutes until the mixture is nice and bubbly. Add the rest of the water, oil and garlic and give it a mix. Combine the dry ingredients then mix into the wet. Press it all out on a pizza stone- keep your fingers plenty wet for this part, then let it rest for 10-15 minutes while the oven preheats to 450. Bake for 15 minutes then remove from the oven, brush the crust with olive oil, top with ingredients of your choice and return to the oven for another 10-12 minutes. YUM YUM!

Breakfast this morning- Pancakes. On the dr's recommendation I tried Pamela's Products pancake mix and I gotta tell you, they aren't just too bad. Texture's a little grittier than I am used to in pancakes but the flavor is great. I think I'll try the waffles one of these mornings. I'm also going to attempt to make Rich's favorite cookies using the Pamela's mix to replace the flour. We'll see how that goes tonight.

Lunch- Miserable failure. I bought some GF wraps at the grocery store this weekend. Wasn't hugely confident from the start but it's an experiment, right? So I made myself a wrap and one for Rich. lil' cream cheese, lil' meat, lil' lettuce, etc... Had the first half of mine around 11. I will not be returning for the 2nd half. First problem was the wrap got SLIMY on the outside. I admit texture issues when it comes to food and slimy is not good... But the weird thing was it was only surface slime. Apparently the wrap is created with some sort of impenetrable barrier to the insides which remained dry and mealy... UGH! Will be interesting to see what Rich has to say about his wrap tonight. I'm not expecting good things... I think I'll make tuna salad with rice noodles for tomorrow!

Dinner tonight should be a good recovery. Italian sausage with peppers and onions, penne (rice pasta of course) and marinara baked with a bit of mozzarella for good measure. YUM!!!

Just say NO (The grand experiment)

A few weeks back my dr told me to try going gluten free to help with a major acid reflux issue I was dealing with.  Resistant as I was at the time, I tried it and I really did feel better- slept better, no heart burn, felt less sluggish during the day, so it was hard to deny he might be onto something.  

In trying to educate myself on just what gluten is and how to eat without it, I've wandered across quite a few websites and a couple of interesting blogs.  I was reading one of the blogs (The Gluten Free Girl) last night and had a light bulb moment- through links to several of her previous posts I got to a post about how a friend was diagnosed with Celiac disease.  Reading about his path to diagnoses made me realize maybe this is what has lead my husband to the dr on a regular basis with complaints of constant aches, tingling extremities, a feeling of constant sluggishness, fatigue, etc.  Over the years he's been through a gamut of test- arthritis, thyroid condition, alteration of his ADHD meds, and it always comes back to the dr saying you're getting older, you're not going to feel like you did when you were 20, etc which has frustrated him to no end.  It sicks when you know somethings wrong but no one can tell you what that might be.  So many things seem to fit that I figure it's worth exploring... Hence the grand experiment.  For the next couple of weeks we're going to try together to just say no to gluten.  

Rich is even more resistant to change than I am I think so the fact that he agreed to give it a shot feels huge.  I stumbled across this entirely by accident but he agrees it's worth a shot to feel good.  Not really out anything except perhaps a few extra food dollars but I can live with that.  So wish us luck. Lunch seems to be my biggest challenge- more on what to feed him than what to eat myself. Poor guy's stuck with a cold sandwich every day but I don't know if I'll manage to find a bread worthy of sandwich making.  No time like the present to experiment though I suppose!

I'm better today...

But it's just cuz my Madden 2009 with Brett Favre on the cover wearing the jersey he's supposed to always wear arrived today.  Will I ever actually play the game... doubtful.  Lets face it, Celebrity Death Match is the only game I've ever actually "mastered" on my PS2 and that's just because all you have to do is randomly push buttons to be successful.  Anything involving strategy or an actual command of what the buttons are supposed to do is entirely beyond my skill set.  Why then, you ask, did I spend 40 of my hard earned dollars on a video game I'll never play... Because it was entertaining when Favre was slated to be the first ever retired player to get the cover shot on Madden.  Now that he's a Jet but the game was released with him in a Packer jersey it's a must own.  Maybe it'll be a collectors item some day.  Probably not but damn it I'm still not ready to accept that my QB is going to be announced as the starter for someone else's team so this is what I do to sooth my football soul.  And I'm ok with that.

It's gone...

Gone I tell you. GONE.  I know where it is but it's not here and I don't like it.  What, you ask? My hope.  Ted Thompson traded my hope to the Jets for a lousy 4th round draft pick.  I'm sitting here watching the first Packer pre-season game of the year.  For the last 15 years I've watched every pre-season game with the same anticipation as if it were the NFC championship game and we were about to go to the Super Bowl.  For those not familiar with Packer fan's...  WE are a part of the team...  We are a running back. We are a wide receiver. We are a  tackle. We are a coach.  Our mood for the next 7 days is decided by the end result of each weeks game...  We just don't get the big paycheck... But I digress.  Last week Thursday that anticipation disappeared along with my quarterback.  I may get my hope back, hopefully even when watching the Packers instead of the Jets, but for now, I just don't know... For 15 and a half years I watched every Sunday knowing that Brett Favre would take the field and ANYTHING was possible.  Aaron Rodgers is a total unknown.  Can miracles happen when he takes the field?  Only time will tell.  For now, I sit here watching the game wondering like the rest of Packer nation if we've opened the door to the next great QB or if we've installed the next revolving door of abysmal quarterbacks and will relive the "great" old times of the 70s and 80s.  I guess only time will tell... and I hate waiting!

It's taken 10 long years...

But I think I've finally found the machine I was meant to sew on.  This weekend I rescued my Great Grandmother's 1910 Singer 66-1 Red Eye in the No. 6 Singer cabinet and I feel like a new woman!  I have a great "modern" machine but we just don't really get along so I've always preferred hand piecing my quilts but my new baby has definitely introduced me to the joy of machine stitching.  I think it's that I need to feel more engaged in the process than I do with the modern sewing machine, so I prefer to hand stitch or now, work the treadle to find my pace and assemble those quilt blocks.  I'm waiting for the actual belt to arrive- After what was likely a 40+ year break in action, the belt on the machine was dry and snapped under the first bit of stress but my wonderful hubby rigged up some string to act as a belt until my new ones arrive so I can play and get a feel for the machine.  Time to go visit with my new baby.  I think she needs a name though... Any suggestions?

You know it's going to be a long day when...

You go to the bathroom and discover you put your underwear on inside out... And they were clean to start with! OY

When the shoe gods smile

Ahhh...  Today turned out to be a great shoe day.  Last night I had a minor crisis on my hands...  Well, more so on my feet...  I thought I lost one of my favorite flip flops.  Yes friends, a tragedy in the making.  I was convinced it fell out of the truck in Podunk (Kiel, WI for those who are familiar) and was lost for all eternity... I could flip but no longer flop...  So, like a good little Boy Scout, I broke out the back-up pair and resigned myself to breaking in a new favorite pair of flip flops.  

Of course, this also meant a trip to Kohl's to try to find a back up pair to the back up pair...  When you find the perfect flip, you just can't risk not finding them again cuz at some point they will neither flip nor flop and need replacing.  A bit of hunting lead me to the Nike flip flop display and I was horrified to discover no prefect brown leather flips left on the shelf.  Not wanting to believe it, I had to search the clearance rack cuz you just never know, right?  But still, no luck.  Unwilling to give up without a fight I went back to the Nike section and searched high and low...  Just as I was about to abandon all hope, there it was...  The beautiful box labeled brown leather thong and praise the shoe gods, that lone pair of flops was... Yes... You guessed it... MY SIZE!!!! OH HAPPY DAY! There is joy in Mudville tonight!  So off to the checkouts I went with my prize, parted happily with my $20 thinking all was again right with the world.  A back up pair of flips is mine. and the day could get no better.

But wait... It COULD get better.  Because as I was making dinner, Rich was unloading the reenacting stuff out of the truck and what to my wondering eyes should appear but my beloved flop! Flip and Flop have been reunited, the back up pair returned to the shelf with their companion back ups and shoe nirvana is mine! 

Things I love

Lunch inspired today's theme... Which is kinda funny actually, since I'm still not thrilled with reaching the conclusion that my Dr is right and gluten is not so much my friend- Lunch was Amy's Rice Mac n Cheese and I gotta tell you, I love this stuff! The rice noodles are absolutely not discernible from regular pasta and the cheese sauce is so creamy and cheesy, what's not to love?! After thought to that one- last night I made spaghetti using Trader Joe's Brown Rice Pasta... Again, not a lick of difference between this pasta and it's wheat-laden counterpart. So YAY! I found pasta that doesn't feel like a sacrifice or a poor substitute!

Another thing I love- fresh fruit. Summer really is the best time of year to eat. Since finding myself needing to find munchies that won't cause more heartburn, I've been buying all kinds of fresh fruit- always knew I loved it, just got away from eating it. No more! I shall eat fresh berries and watermelon until I burst!

More food- beef roast, mashed 'taters and corn. OK, probably a bit carb-heavy for today's food pyramid but you know what, I don't care. It's my version of a Happy Meal. Added bonus- virtually no cooking with the aid of my Crock Pot and Yoder's Homestyle Mashed Potatoes. Gotta love when putting dinner on the table's that easy.

So of course there are things I love that don't involve food. Like good news from a friend yesterday. Can't spill the beans on the particulars but I couldn't be more excited if it were my own news! I love having people in my life to share both the highs and lows with and it's such a great feeling to be as excited for someone else's happiness as for my own! Makes every day like Christmas.

Then there's the fun of a trip to my favorite place on earth, Ye Olde Schoolhouse. Getting to chat with Jeannie while fondling bolts of delicious fabric- hardly gets better than that!

The odd one- having a cannon and knowing how to use it! It's just such an odd life skill I can't help but love it! Though I could live without driving it through toll plazas again for a good long time. Didn't love that so much... But I proved to myself that I can do it and I do love that!

OK off to think up more things I love. Wait... No, I should probably work now.

Things that intrigue me

It was a big debate today- more political babble or a conversation with myself about friendship. Tough decision but in the end I decided politics can wait, friendships are more fun to talk about!

So I've been thinking a lot lately about the e-mail that goes around every now and again talking about how friends can come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. The older I get, the more I realize how very true that is. I've also come to realize recently that sometimes the reason or season friends can go away for a while but then come back.

Thinking back to grade school, I think most of the friends I had were "reason" friends with one or two "season" friends. I was never a particularly popular kid so in grade school most of my friends were from my Camp Fire group. I remember going to their birthday parties and inviting them to mine but we typically grew apart as we headed toward middle school where there were more kids with different interests and we started to explore our own individuality. Again, through the years, friendships were made then faded but we all filled a role for a time when something was needed in each of our lives. The one friend who really stuck from that time period was Lesley. I think I spent more weekend time at her house than my own from 2nd grade through about my junior year of high school. It was a long season and I enjoyed every minute of it but by the end of high school we grew apart- different interests and different groups of friends just took us in different directions in life. I'm still sad sometimes that we didn't stay close and in fact, when her dad passed away unexpectedly my senior year of college, I opted to go home for his funeral instead of staying on campus for one of our biggest "play" weekends of the year. That was probably the first realization I had turned into a grown up, but that's a story for another day. My mom still runs into Lesley's mom from time to time and gives me updates but it feels like a chapter of my life was closed and I still haven't decided how I feel about that.

Then came college. Definitely some of the best days I've had as I look back. Through a weird twist of fate, I ended up on the same floor of the same dorm as the one other girl from my high school class that went to St Norbert. Neither of us found any particular fascination in each other's presence initially but it didn't take long before we became lifetime friends. She was Zig and I became Zag and together we had a blast. Even if I wanted to, there would be no breaking up with Zig because she knows where all the bodies are buried! Met a lot of other really great friends in the process, too and even though we don't see or hear enough of each other, I think most of my college friends will always play some role in my life in a way that the grade school through high school friends never did.

After college I started Civil War reenacting thanks to one of those college friends. Since joining the Civil War community I've made friends from all walks of life- people I'd otherwise never have known but who have enriched my life with their presence. I see more of them than I do my family so that's probably a good thing! Reenacting also brought one of my closest friends from college back into my life and strengthened a friendship that's become one of my biggest blessings in life.

Then of course is what might be the "strangest" group of friends I have- my Internet buddies. Once upon a time, life lead me to Baby Center, first looking for all the information I could find on trying to get pregnant, then support after a miscarriage and eventually support for infertility. It's the last 2 groups where I met some of my most valued friends. Even though some of us have only met once, a couple 2 or three times, I still consider them among my closest friends in life. A few have come and gone, each filling a reason or lasting a season where we could support each
other through a difficult time but then we moved on to other things, but some- man I plan to haunt them until I'm too old and senile to remember who I am let alone them! Oddly enough, anonymity also allowed each of us to open up to the point where we all know where each other's bodies are buried, too... That could be trouble some day! LOL

Then comes the friendship that, well, baffles me most lately, one of my roommates my senior year at SNC. We were friends from the freshman year dorm experience, never necessarily close, but one thing led to another and she became one of 4 in our apartment that year. You know how some people can't be married but they can be friends, well it turns out we could be friends but we couldn't live together. Senior year was a roller coaster ride of ups and downs and when all was said and done, I was quite certain the season for that friendship had passed and I walked away not really interested in looking back. Fast forward 10 years to our upcoming class reunion. We reconnected, somewhat grudgingly on my end I must admit, but in the end we both realized that shit that happened 10 years ago was no longer worth harboring ill will over- we both grew up a lot and found our paths in life and it was actually a rather refreshing and exciting thing to sooth old wounds and start talking again. Recently we've been doing more talking and I can honestly say I hope we're able to continue that. We shared some really good times during our 4 years of college and that is far more important than the the petty crap that made me walk away 12 years ago (damn, has it really been that long?).

So yeah, I'm waxing nostalgic today. Thankful that even though life hasn't always given me what I want, it's always given me what I need in the form of friends who've gotten me through the good days and the bad. I am grateful for each and every one of the friendships I've made, especially the ones I still consider sisters today. Life just wouldn't be the same without you

The cats are away but the mice can't play

What do you do on a Friday afternoon when the bosses have flown the coop but the staff is still stuck at work... Start blogging of course! Maybe not the wisest career move but it passes the time. So welcome to my collection of random thoughts. Even I can't always explain what goes on in my head but here's the place where I'm going to ramble about it. If you're brave enough to read it once, thank you. If you're brave enough to come back for more, I'm sorry. Really. I am. Sincerely.

So today's random thought... I hate working Fridays. For the last many years I've been lucky enough to get every other Friday off. Love those... Really, who doesn't want to spend Friday on the couch in her fuzzy slippers. The problem with my schedule... The OTHER Friday. The ones I have to spend at the office. Especially when all of the partners are out playing and we are stuck in the office. Spring has finally sprung in Wisconsin (Good thing since it's officially summer) and the sun shining through my office windows is taunting me. Again, probably shouldn't complain since I actually have windows and the rest of the staff doesn't but still... I hate when the sun taunts me. It was easier to be here this morning when it was gray, cloudy and looked like a storm was brewing. A storm would have been cool... But instead it's sunny and I have another hour and a half 'til quittin' time. Bugger.